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Close to You...

May 31st 2008 04:17
Here is an excerpt of an article I wrote for Helium on the topic "Memoirs: Bonding with your baby in the womb during pregnancy"

From the fourth month of my pregnancy up to the time I gave birth, I stopped working. It was my first pregnancy and I don’t know how sensitive I am with the situation and I don’t want to risk the pregnancy by stressing myself at work. Day to day, while my husband is at work, it’s just me and my big tummy. Whenever I feel lonely, worried or just wanting a companion, I rub my big, bulging tummy and talk with the little person inside my womb.

I remember how I monitor my baby’s movement each day. There was this one day that I got anxious as it is already midday and I can’t remember feeling him move or kick. I placed both my hand on my tummy and waited a few minutes... feeling... waiting... nothing. Tears started down my eyes and I started to panic. Then, as if to console myself, I started singing... “Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near? Just like me they long to be close to you...” And, alas, even before I got halfway through the song, the little angel inside of me kicked and moved around.

And then, he was born. As a baby, he is difficult to settle when he starts crying. Often, he doesn’t want to be put down in his crib. He just wants to be carried around or simply held in my (or my husband’s) arms. There was this one night, he was deep in sleep and all of a sudden woke up and looks like he’d just been a part of a bad dream. No cuddles or shushing could settle him. Holding him on my lap and rocking side by side I started to sing, “Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near. Just like me they long to be close to you...” as if in recognition he stopped crying and looked at my face. The loud protesting cries settled down to muffled sobs then he closed his eyes and wriggled his mouth to a pout and without protests he allowed me to put him back to sleep.

He recognizes the song! He recognizes me singing it to him! I triumphantly thought. I don’t have a good singing voice (actually it’s really bad), but my baby doesn’t seem to mind. It’s like he understands what I want to tell him just by singing him that very song. After that incident, every time we are having difficulty settling him, all I have to do is sing that same song to him. No matter how bad my tune (and my voice) is, it seems to have a calming effect on him.

The bond between my son and me is a living testament to the kind of bond that a mother can start with her child even during pregnancy. That is the magic of motherhood that, although unfathomable, is indeed a fact.


Click here to read the full version of the article.

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